They can’t be planned. You only realise you’re on one when it’s too late. They only attack single people; couples are immune to them. Yes, you know what I’m talking about: the dreaded, horrible, downright scary bad first date. The horror! The horror!

They sneak up on you. When you are out and exchanging numbers, you’re in a good mood and willing to give anything a go. Everyone looks like a catch – until you get to the first date.

But fear not, because there is always a way to avoid bad dates, including those you have met online or on a set-up from friends.

Just as jails have a screen between prisoners and visitors, you too can have a buffer. Take some friends along, and make your first date a group thing. You can bounce off conversations with one another, taking the tension off having just the two of you alone. If all goes well, you can break from the herd and do your own thing. If not, just chat with your friends more than your date, and soon your date should get the picture.

If you want to take a risk and don’t need a buffer, bravo for taking the plunge alone. Have a back-up plan instead, something you’re going to do afterwards, like meeting friends for a drink or a movie. Make sure you mention it near the start so it doesn’t seem like you’re lying later on. Don’t lie, actually organise something – that way, if the date goes well, you can either cancel it or take them along.

One way to avoid bad dates is to skip the first date dinner. Dinner means you’re stuck there for three courses when you may have been turned off by the entrée. Just meet for drinks or coffee. It’s less formal than dinner and more relaxing. Best of all, if they’re a dud, you can drink quickly, look at your watch and go. Otherwise, if you’ve picked a winner, drinks can move onto a meal.

But the best strategy to avoid a bad date is the classic friend phone call. Get one of your friends to call and say something terrible has happened, about half an hour into your date. That’s enough time to know if you want to stay or abandon ship.

If you want to leave, muster the acting skills you learned from the soaps and, with a look of horror, say something like you have to leave and race out the door, deleting their number from your phone as you go.

Despite the rumour, a bad date can be avoided. You won’t know one until you’re on one, but you can escape it unharmed and with your optimism intact. After all, if you have one bad date then a good one is just around the corner.

by KLINTON PORTER